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On tonight's edition of Comedy Central's "Colbert Report," he riffed on the news that doctors are encouraging men to get vasectomy surgery a few days before the start of the NCAA basketball tournament so they have an excuse to sit on a bag of frozen peas and watch basketball nonstop while recovering.
He added: "But folks, if a vasectomy will get you out of work for three days, why stop there? A simple outpatient lobotomy and you'll be on the couch for the entire season of Ultimate Fighting with the mental capacity to enjoy it."
He followed up in the next story by saying: "If I had one criticism about chess, it's that you can't punch your opponent in the face... until now."
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"There's still a large contingent of people, that they just want to see these guys almost die, or the other guy almost die and come back, and sometimes fights are like that. Certainly they are. But sometimes you get technical masterpieces too, and to hate a beautiful, technical fight - you're not really a fight fan...
Diaz has a granite chin, possesses perhaps the best recovery in the sport, his pace and conditioning are second to none and he sets records with the volume of his punches almost every time he steps into the cage. Nick Diaz is simply designed to fight the way he fights, and not many other fighters are...
"There was a lot of poison going on around there and I'm really disappointed because we had a good thing going. It was a good thing and I think people's egos got in the way. Well, not people just Javier, his ego got in the way, and too many cameras in the gym and him trying to build himself up and his brand, his AKA brand...
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