Nov 20, 2008 - 7:43:01 PM By: Jason Bent, MMATorch Columnist
This episode began with post-fight reactions to Krzysztof Soszynski's submission victory over Kyle Kingsbury. Junie Browning is one who is less than pleased with Soszynski shouting, "I got jiu-jitsu too" and answered this by saying, "Yeah, but Kyle don't. I wasn't impressed." Junie also stated that his sister could have caught Kyle in an arm bar, and it was really odd to see that Junie had a problem with the antics of another fighter in the house.
When you consider that Junie Browning is the guy who jumped the Octagon and declared that other fighters tried out for the show so that they could get a free TapOut t-shirt, it seems peculiar that he would be put off by Soszynski's boasts. I do agree that defeating Kyle Kingsbury at this stage of his career is not something for Soszynski to gloat over, but I felt his comments were directed towards everyone who imagined that he was simply a striker. I didn't have a problem with his remarks but feel that he should have probably kept these thoughts to himself and acted like the veteran he is.
We were then treated to a montage of John Polakowski hugging everyone. This guy loves to hug and he feels that people today are content to just go through the motions and not really commit to the hug. John Polakowski likes to hold it for that extra, awkward second in order to show how much he cares. I have encountered a "serial hugger" or two in my day, and usually they are the guys who spend their days kicking the hacky-sack outside of a Starbucks and always seem to have a pipe and an acoustic guitar on their person. They never have any money, rarely have identification or direction, but they have their pipe, views on how we can all become better neighbors and cap it all off with an awkward hug that leaves you feeling dirty and smelling of patchouli.
Off to the gym to witness George Roop's preparations for his fight with John Polakowski and a chance to learn something about Frank Mir's last pick. What we learn is that he had a miserable childhood growing up and was the "skinny white boy who got picked on" before he changed his life and began training in mixed martial arts. This reminded me of those Jhoon Rhee Tae Kwon Do commercials which used to air when I was a child and featured Rhee's children saying "nobody bothers me" and "nobody bothers me, either" before the toll free number flashed across the screen. Roop has much to be proud of but usually if you get picked on as a child you end up kicking ass or sitting through endless therapy sessions once older. George decided to make them all pay, and he probably sees childhood bullies while he trains in the gym. Of course, instead of fighting a guy who gave him a wedgie while growing up, he shall be fighting a man who just loves to hug; and both can make one feel all sorts of discomfort.
George Roop hyperextended his hand and injured it badly during training. He was rolling with Shane Nelson and inadvertently backed into the cage; hand first. Roop knew this was bad from the moment it happened, and since it was his right hand which is his dominant one, looked to address things quickly to remain in the competition. George vowed to fight on regardless of the condition of his hand, which was so bad that he was unable to form a fist.
Frank Mir shrugged the injury off by saying how he has never gone into a fight without some injury; and then he said, "we're not making cupcakes here" when alluding to the fact that injuries are the name of the game. I agree with him on injuries and the need to fight on but must correct him as far as the cupcakes go. These fighters have definitely been making cupcakes all season long, as most episodes have featured them in the kitchen. From pissing in fruit to serving up birthday cakes it has been a culinary season. Roop is a tough kid and his hand is definitely in worse shape than Krzysztof's was.
Wouldn't you know it, we are taken to the kitchen and it is breakfast time in the TUF house. John Polakowski enters the kitchen looking like the guys from the "Freecreditreport.com" commercial where they are employed in a pirate-themed restaurant and selling "fish to tourists in t-shirts." Polakowski is a strange bird who loves to shout, "fire the cannons," and even petitioned Phillipe Nover to draw a picture of a cannon firing to capture this feeling.
Dressing as a pirate, shouting about firing cannons and hugging strangers doesn't sound like a MMA fighter, but rather an 80-yr. old man in a diaper who lives on the third floor of the nursing home facility and will toss his bedpan at you if you happen to make eye contact with him. Of course, it would seem that John is a nice guy who just can't get flustered, although this would change the moment he poured his breakfast cereal into a bowl.
All of the marshmallows from John Polakowski's box of "Lucky Charms" were gone. We would find out that Tom Lawlor of Team Mir was the culprit, and he argued that there were two boxes and John should just relax. John will not just relax. He wants his "Lucky Charms," dammit! Personally, I think they should make that cereal with nothing but marshmallows and just please everyone, but I will agree that you can't eat just the cereal pieces by themselves.
Polakowski was livid that someone would do such a thing to his cereal, and it looked like we were going to see a fight involving a pirate and a piss drinker, but this one went no further than some words being exhanged. Shane Nelson of Team Mir is shocked that Polakowski is so angry over cereal and says, "you can piss in everyone's fruit, talk about his mom but don't f**k with his Lucky Charms." Talk of retaliation is brief, and while someone is heard saying that he should sh*t on something, cooler heads prevail and John Polakowski is going to retaliate inside of the Octagon.
More training clips are shown and we see John Polakowski training while Phillipe Nover tells us that, "John is the nicest guy I have ever met, and I don't know if he has the killer instinct." I have to agree as he hugs everyone and only gets angry when you steal his stale marshmallows; but from the footage I have seen of his trilogy with Olaf Alfonso, it would seem like he has the ability to flip the switch when necessary.
John again lets us know that he plans on handling the cereal incident inside of the cage. We are treated to scenes of "Stankie" yelling at him during training, and I have to say that if anyone needs that pirate hat it would be "Stankie." It would go well with his earring and the man just seems crazy enough as it is so why not slap a funny hat on him and get it over with. One thing for certain is "Stankie" kind of reminds me of the crusty junior varsity football coach I once had who would throw forearm shivers at us during practice if he was getting frustrated. Caution must be used when dealing with crazy, old men, and "Stankie" is definitely a touch crazy.
George Roop's hand looks like the ass of a female gorilla in heat as it is similar to a red catcher's mitt. He continues to ice the hand and lets us know that it hurts like hell. Roop's toughness cannot be disputed as he injured his hand and not once looked for a way out of this fight. When you consider that he injured the hand and fought just four days later it really hits you that this guy has the mental toughness to be a fighter.
Look at how many of us would complain if we simply slept on our arms and woke up with some discomfort and ask yourself how you would manage with a hand like Roop's. George needed to enter a fight while being unable to comfortably form a fist with his dominant hand and still be able to do enough to win. The rest of us would be struggling just to wipe our asses with our left hand and whining about how much the right one hurts. Mir's plan for George is to use the left hand when on the feet and quickly take this fight to the ground since, Polakowski has the "worst jiu-jitsu in the house." Roop's plan is to fight and again I have to take my hat off to his toughness.
Both fighters weigh in and Roop is at 155-1/2 lbs. with Polakowski coming in under the limit at a ready 153-1/2 lbs. The fight is official and it's almost time to see if the hugging machine can beat the one handed man in our final quarterfinal fight in the lightweight division. Frank Mir says it would be an easy win for Roop were it not for the injured hand, but at this point I really expected Polakowski to show us his angry side and see Roop as one large purple horseshoe marshmallow.
If the guys aren't fighting, they are eating so it was back to the house and time for a dinner segment. This show is put together like an old sitcom in that we always have the family coming together for a meal at least once per episode. Of course, just like a sitcom we have the wacky neighbor who always pops in as Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira fills this role admirably.
Nogueira is like Kramer from 'Seinfeld,' in that he is big, not too photogenic and seems to just show up randomly to the house. I am waiting for him to slide across the floor and say, "Hello Fighters" before raiding the cupboards and asking what they have to eat. Nogueira picks on Roop and just tries to get under his skin a little before the fight. Roop deals with Nogueira like the rest of us would an elderly relative who insisted on telling some racist jokes at the dinner table, in that he laughed uncomfortably and ate faster so that he could get the hell away. Big Nog is lonely, and I am afraid that it won't be long before he starts popping up in the bedrooms wanting to share a hot cup of cocoa and a blanket to help him make it through the night. Of course if Nogueira asked you to snuggle you would look for an exit route or give in to his demands in order to remain alive, so let's hope he is getting all the company he needs at dinner time.
Time for the fight and the two men meet in the center of the Octagon and embrace for a moment. No touching of the gloves but a hug; and this was actually a pretty cool little moment. I would have snidely remarked that Polakowski would rather hug than touch gloves but never would have imagined that he would actually do so. Much like a domestic abuse call on the show 'Cops,' what began as a hug turned into a brawl and the two men opened up the first round by throwing some decent shots.
Roop's hand appeared to not give him much trouble and he was able to consistently keep punching with it when you just knew it would hurt like hell once the adrenaline wore off. The striking was fairly even, which shocked me as I expected Polakowski to control matters with his fists. George took John down at 3:22 of the round and controlled the action for the remainder of this round. Roop landed a few good elbows but for the most part was not landing a high percentage of shots. He proceeded to take John's back at about the two minute mark and it seemed for a moment that this one could be on its way to ending early before Polakowski overcame and finished the round atop Roop. This round was clearly a 10-9 one for Roop in my eyes and his elbows really won it for him.
In between rounds we are treated to a curious moment as Polakowski asks his corner, "Did I win the first round?" and after they blatantly lied by telling him yes he followed up with, "Are you sure?" This seemed straight out of the twilight zone as it was more like a young child asking his dad why the sky is blue rather than a man asking his corner if the fight was turning out the way they had planned.
Before we enter round two it was time for a commercial break and one of many commercials for 'Transporter 3' starring Frank Mir.
Ok, starring Jason Statham but that Frank Mir could totally play that role, and he is really excited to see it once it hits theaters. Frank could never be the "Transporter" in much the same way that I couldn't be Jean Claude Van Damme from 'Timecop' when I was 16; which became painfully clear when I attempted to pull off his split and was unable to walk upright for a few days. I have never seen any of the 'Transporter,' films and probably will not see this third one, either. Having Frank Mir tell me how cool they are is doing nothing to make me want to rent the first two and queue up for the third one. I was waiting all night for Frank to just tell me to see it because it's "cool" and was left wondering just how many takes it took to pull these off. Tank Abbott could do a better job selling me the Ab Roller than Mir did this film.
The second round began and both fighters picked up the pace from the first round and really gave their all. John Polakowski let his hands go, and this was the fighter I expected to see all along as he dictated the first two minutes of this round with his fists and knees. John has some decent hand speed but really doesn't have any power behind his shots, which became painfully obvious once Roop began firing back at him around the three minute mark. Roop with his bad hand was landing better shots, and I have to wonder if Mir was correct in stating that the injured hand would make this one harder than it needed to be.
Roop took Polakowski down and landed some heavy shots including one which opened up a gash on John's nose. Roop took it to the cage and went back to landing the elbows which were so effective in round one. Again, Roop would take Polakowski's neck and once again he could do nothing with it and was unable to even attempt to finish this one off. George continuously landed more elbows and had Polakowski secured in a decent body triangle as the round came to a close.
This round was harder to score and I can see how you could go both ways and award it to either man. The first half of this round was all Polakowski, and he was able to defend himself successfully throughout the second half. However, you can also argue that Roop more than weathered the offensive outburst and controlled matters for the majority of the round. I scored this one 10-9 for Polakowski but concede that it could just as well have gone to Roop.
Which it did as George Roop was winner by unanimous decision and we would not go to a third round. Many, including Dana White, felt it should have but the judges have the final say and they viewed this one as Roop's fight from start to finish. I feel that the second half of round number two secured it for Roop, and really do believe that he could have performed at a higher level had he not suffered the hand injury.
Frank Mir described the fight by saying that, "Roop had one hand and two legs. Polakowski had two hands but no legs" in summing up this fight, and I hate to say it but I agree with him. By no means is Roop a top flight fighter but he impressed me by showing grit, determination and a skill set that was much better than Polakowski's. George Roop gets a lot of credit for showing us that the last man picked may not always be the weakest one.
John Polakowski wanted to celebrate and so we were off to the house for shots of Johnny Walker and a hot tub full of men. With as many shots of men in speedos as this show has given me, I have often had to check to make sure I wasn't watching a MMA reality show on the 'Logo' network. Just as the fellas are getting their drink on it would be time for "Shecky" Soszynski to start a food fight by hurling eggs towards the hot tub.
Junie Browning was struck by an egg and did his best Chris Leben impression as he charged the house and tried to slam the door off of its hinges. Browning went off, and Soszynski kept telling him to lighten up; and what looked like it could turn into a fight was over as soon as it began. I have seen more guys get hit with food than clean shots inside the Octagon on this season of 'The Ultimate Fighter,' but am hopeful this will change as the upcoming fights look capable of delivering plenty of action.
The quarterfinals were now behind us and it was time for the fighters to meet with the two coaches and Dana White in order to let it be known who they would prefer to fight. Everyone generally calls out the toughest guy, and Dana proceeds to let them know that this is a dumb move, and implores them to be more strategic when making their selection. The truth is that real fighters will call out those that they imagine to be on their level, and it is rare to meet a world class athlete who wants to take on an easy opponent.
Dana White needs the best fights to take place at the finale, and as such is really steering them towards making decisions that will guarantee that the two final fights feature the four best fighters. This is the right thing to do if you are in White's shoes but let it be known that the fighters aren't stupid for calling out the tougher foes, but rather that these fights are hopefully being saved for the big show. Anything can happen in a fight, and it is possible that you could lose two of your better fighters and end up with a finale featuring two men who shouldn't be in such a position at all. The final eight fighters from this season are a solid group but anyone can see who should be making it to the finals and who really does not belong.
In the light heavyweight semi-finals we have Ryan Bader going up against Eliot Marshall along with Krzysztof Soszynski taking on Vinny Magalhaes. In the lightweight ranks our final two fights consist of Phillipe Nover vs. George Roop and Junie Browning facing Efrain Escudero in a grudge match of sorts. It would seem to appear that we could end up with finals of Bader vs. Soszynski and Browning vs. Nover, which would make for one hell of a finale to say the least. Anything of course can and may well happen, but I'd bank on those four making it to the big show and fighting for the contracts.
A moment of humor as George Roop stated that he intends on getting "that hundred thousand dollar contract," which made me laugh because while it is announced at being "six figures" it is worth much more than 100K. Although I wouldn't put it past Dana White to tell them they are fighting for "100 Grand" and then hand them a candy bar after the fight was over. Just ask Jon Fitch about how things can turn out to be not what they seemed.
The preview for next week consisted of running through the remaining matchups as we move another step closer to the finale. No program will air next week as the two final episodes will air on Wednesday December 3 beginning at 9pm EST on Spike TV. Two weeks off but we shall get two hours of 'The Ultimate Fighter' and four fights in one evening so this is nothing to complain about.
It looks like Junie Browning again goes off like a roman candle and faces expulsion, but at this point he would have to actually maim someone on the crew for this to happen. Whether you like his antics or not, Junie Browning is the real deal and I still predict he wins the entire thing. I have seen many of his fights and have known of him for some time, and the kid is skilled beyond his years. The day he finds a way to harness all of this ability is the day we welcome a lightweight monster onto the scene. Nothing against Nover but going from just what I have seen I still rate Browning on another level.
No scenes involving food are shown in the preview but there has to be a few moments which take place in the kitchen, and I am sure that Nogueira stops by for a nice meal or two. So take next week off but be sure to have your Speedo on at 9pm sharp on December 3rd for one more night in the hot tub, and our four final bouts to determine who gets the chance to win it all. This season has been like one big dare, and I think after all of the semen and piss drinking that we are more than ready to see the best fights take place. If you have hung around this long, you deserve it and I have no doubts the final four fights will deliver.
Last one in the tub is a rotten egg. Or gets hit with one. Or maybe drinks a glass of piss; who knows but be sure to tune in for the final episodes of 'The Ultimate Fighter' on Spike TV.
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