Aug 28, 2009 - 9:08:09 PM by Shawn Ennis, MMATorch Senior Columnist
After a change in venues and main events over the last few weeks, M-1 Global will finally hit the airwaves in their bid to become a fight promoter that someone has heard of.
We get the initial hype from Schiavello and Mezger before they throw it to Ron Kruck, who's talking to "King Mo" Lawal. Lawal makes some strange comments about wanting to shave Don Frye's mustache after their scheduled fight, and how he's disappointed he won't be able to do that.
Ian Freeman is randomly our ring announcer tonight, and he gets the crowd of at least 300-400 people all ready to go. The lights are pretty dark in this place, so it's hard to see how many people are in the lower level, but the upper level is almost completely deserted.
The lights remain very much down during the fighter entrances, and I can't even see Ferrid Kheder until he gets to the ring. Daisuke Nakamura makes his way to the ring next, and I'm seeing some of the lower level now. There are entire rows that are completely empty. This is, of course, all to be expected with a venue change coming two weeks before the event was to go off. It doesn't help that no one's ever heard of M-1 Global, either. Although you would think, with them being a global powerhouse of a promoter, that they could fill an arena this size on short notice. (The Memorial Hall in Kansas City seats about 3,500.)
The first fight, as mentioned is Daisuke Nakamura vs. Ferrid Kheder in a lightweight bout. Nakamura dominated the first round, peppering Kheder throughout with knees and punches. I don't think Nakamura has the power to knock this guy out, but he's not facing much opposition at this point.
Nakamura continued to work the same gameplan in the second round, though Kheder decided to try some offense as well. The round was actually pretty entertaining, with Nakamura going for flying triangles every time Kheder would mount an offensive of any consequence. Kheder definitely looks to have the more power of the two, while Nakamura seems to be a bit more technical. I'm giving the second round to Nakamura as well.
As a side note, I hate it when announcers refer constantly to Compustrike. I don't mind Schiavello at all, though I can see how he would be annoying to some, but his pimping of the Compustrike stats is extremely tiresome. Same goes for Mezger. In addition, they are way overreacting to punches that are not doing damage.
Kheder was finally able to use his judo in the final frame, landing a really nice belly-to-back suplex about halfway through, but Nakamura continued to pepper him throughout the round. For every hard shot that Kheder landed, Nakamura landed about 50 jabs and a decent power shot of his own. (That's from my unscientific exaggeration rather than Compustrike.) Kheder actually cinched in an arm triangle as the round ended, but it's going to go to Nakamura again.
RESULT: Daisuke Nakamura by unanimous decision (no scores provided)
STAR RATING: (***) Good action throughout, though not all that competitive for much of it.
After the commercial, Ron Kruck chats up Fedor, and the Russian gets a pretty good ovation from the 25 people in attendance. Nothing much is said. Thoughts on exhibitions and Brett Rogers and whatnot. He looks completely bored with the proceedings. Can't say I blame him. He does mention that he doesn't see much difference between the ring and the cage, which is…interesting.
Heavyweights are up next, as we get Lloyd Marshbanks vs. Michael Kita. Kita says how everyone dreams about fighting in America. He didn't mention that most people dream about fighting in front of crowds of 1,000 or more, but that's just details. Also, Schiavello just called Gilbert Yvel "legendary." The hyperbole has begun to get out of hands, my friends. Marshbanks apparently claims a record of 52-8, but his official record is 17-8 (or 18-8 according to Sherdog.) Interesting how all of his unrecorded fights are wins. Huh. And inexplicably, HDNet actually puts the 52-8 on the graphic, and Ian Freeman announces it as his record.
The first round sees Kita pound out Marshbanks pretty easily, with the larger man tapping out due to what seems like a shoulder injury. This may have been the worst performance I've ever seen from a referee, as Marshbanks tapped 3 separate times, with the ref actually almost stopping the fight after the second time but then deciding not to. This guy should never be allowed near an MMA ring again. Then Guy Mezger makes it worse by saying that the same ref didn't stop a fight during a preliminary bout until way after he should have. Pretty shocking: the same state that allowed an event to come rolling into town on two weeks notice would trot out some terrible referees. M-1 Global and Missouri: making great things happen.
RESULT: Kita by submission (strikes)
STAR RATING: (*) Disgraceful.
More heavyweights coming with the third fight, Rob Broughton vs. Jessie Gibbs. And look who the ref is! The same exact guy that just failed to stop a fight after three tapouts. I didn't notice – maybe this is the only guy they've got tonight. Good thing Gilbert Yvel and Mike Kyle aren't fighting tonight – I have a feeling this dude would be loathe to call any fouls. If he sees them.
Not much action in the first round. I'm not sure if it's because these guys don't look in great shape or because it was actually sloppy, but the round looked pretty sloppy. I'd give the round to Gibbs for maintaining position and using a kimura to sweep.
I don't know who won the second round, but I know everyone who witnessed it lost. The crowd of 16 began to grow restless after the two behemoths were loathe to engage each other.
The third round was more of the same, as my eyes began to bleed from boredom. Move along, folks. Nothing to see here. Also after the 900th pun of the night, I now can't stand Mike Schiavello.
RESULT: Gibbs by a big fat who cares decision.
STAR RATING: (*) Zzzzzzz.
We get a pre-taped interview with "The Eating Machine," Mark Kerr. Nothing to see here either.
Thankfully we get a new referee for Mikhail Zayats vs. Lucio Linhares, a middleweight bout. As I thought to myself how Linhares looks like Gerard Butler in 300, they announce that his nickname is "The Spartan." And of course, later we learn that it's because he looks like Gerard Butler in 300. Also I was lying about having a new ref. I'm not sure whom I was looking at there, but it's still the gloriously incompetent Steve Thomasson.
Linhares clips Zayats during some windmilling by both fighters, and then chokes him out with the rear naked. Thomasson is woefully out of position during the striking, but somehow manages to pull Linhares off after just one tapout. And by the way, the first shot that floored Zayats was completely on the back of the head.
RESULT: Linhares by submission at 1:00 of round one.
STAR RATING: (**-) Not pretty, but certainly effective.
More middleweight action here as we get John Doyle vs. Karl Amoussou. Schiavello is very excited about this guy, and he must be something special because he's the only fighter besides Fedor who's listed on M-1 Global's website. He's going to look not so great if he loses to Doyle, a guy who's 2-7 in his last nine fights.
The ref makes himself look foolish in shoving Amoussou away from Doyle during the staredown. Also I find it hilarious that Schiavello has said with every fight that both fighters are receiving great ovations, when every foreign fighter has been booed tonight. And one more thing about the announcing: Ian Freeman has announced all the American fighters as fighting out of the United States. You can announce states, and even cities here, you know.
Guy Mezger says he's concerned for Doyle's health with this ref officiating. Just sad. Doyle takes a beating for a minute before tapping out to a rear naked choke.
RESULT: Amoussou by submission at 3:15 of round one.
STAR RATING: (**) Quick and not all that competitive. They're really trying to play this guy up as something special, but it doesn't mean much when you beat a guy that's 8-8 on a show like this. Kruck says in the post-fight that Amoussou has now faced a real American wrestler. A part of me dies inside, having been poisoned by hyperbole.
Amoussou says he wants to fight for Strikeforce. Not the UFC, but Strikeforce, where there are lots of tough fighters, according to him. If he could name three middleweights in Strikeforce, I'd be impressed. I'm not saying they're not there, mind you. I'm just saying it's a little phony when a guy who's under contract to M-1 talks up how Strikeforce has great fighters.
Next up is the exhibition that no one was clamoring for: Fedor vs. Mousasi.
Fedor gets easily the biggest ovation of the night from the crowd of 28 people. Also, they sure do throw around this whole "Best fighter in the world" title a whole lot. They announce it both from the booth and from the ring as if it's an undisputed title. Then of course Schiavello and Mezger throw around some trash talk about Brock Lesnar, saying Lesnar is not in Fedor's league. Mind you, this is the consensus number two heavyweight in the world they're talking about.
I'm not understanding the purpose of this exhibition, as they seem to be taking turns throwing each other around. Mousasi had an armbar cinched, and didn't pursue it at all. And it kind of looked like Fedor let him get it. So color me confused and indifferent. Fedor locks in an armbar as it seems to have been predetermined that he would do, and both men exit smiling.
The evening gets more random, if that's possible, as we cut to a space shuttle launch in Cape Canaveral. No, seriously. I'm watching a space shuttle launch right now. It's cool and all, mind you, but if there was ever a weird night of fights and events, it's this one. And you'll be happy to know that the space shuttle Discovery launched successfully.
Alright, finally we're getting to the main event of Mark Kerr vs. Muhammed Lawal. It's a heavyweight fight, since almost every active light heavyweight is under contract with the UFC, and there's no one left to fight Lawal. Kerr doesn't look so horrible here, and he gets a much more friendly ovation than Lawal, who apparently draws the ire of the crowd either by opposing Kerr or by being, shall we say, ostentatious.
It's quick, and it's ugly. Lawal gets Kerr down with a single leg, then pounds him out in short order. He takes about three unanswered shots without moving or defending before the ref decides to stop it. Mark Kerr has got to stop fighting before he gets himself seriously hurt.
RESULT: Lawal by KO at 0:15 of round one.
STAR RATING: (*) This fight shouldn't have happened.
This event was pretty much a waste of time – it was worth watching from a historical perspective, but from a fight perspective, the first fight was the only one that belonged on any MMA card ever.
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It looked like Kerr was out and took 3 punches while unconscious, but I
think what happened was that he damaged his shoulder on the takedown, and
just couldn't defend himself. And either Metzger (what a shill) or
Schiavello on more than one instance indicated that the ring was awfully
hard, which may have contributed to it, too.
Jay
29 Aug 2009, 03:31
To be fair, Space shuttle vs. Gravity was the most competitive fight of the
night and the only one I had any interest in seeing.
I can't decide if it was more scripted than Fedor vs. Mousasi though.
